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Entries tagged as ‘Japanese’

Unpredictable

October 17, 2009 · 81 Comments

Thank you all for your warm regards towards my church member back in Virginia. His nutrition IV has been pulled as of last night, and for now, all we can do is wait…My father has already visited him many times, and the reassuring thing is how peaceful the man is…

Life is so…unpredictable.

My mom said something yesterday on the phone to me that struck me hard: “I went to visit him today…and Sophia, he looked just like you a year ago, all skin and bones. His cheekbones were protruding, and even the veins on his temples were visible…Oh Sophia, he looked just like you.”

That brought my memory back to about a year ago. I was beside him on the church altar. We were both on our knees, and the whole church was gathered around us, praying aloud for us. At that time, he had already discovered his cancer, but was not at a terminal stage yet. But I was.

We were both really, really ill. He wept and wept as the church prayed out loud, sincere and cut to the heart. In the meantime, my cheeks were dry; my heart was still hardened by despair and disbelief. I didn’t believe I’d ever get well, and I had pretty much given up on life.

How strange…that God chose to restore me, the disbeliever, but He chooses to take away the other who truly, desperately wanted to get well. I don’t understand the work of God. I really…don’t.

Oh, Lord, why? Why choose me? What am I, that you would preserve my worthless life here on earth?

I voiced the same question to my mom. “We don’t know the reason, Sophia,” she answered gently. “But trust in God that there is a purpose. Trust in Him, and give thanks to Him. Life is unpredictable, but God always is. His plans, His love, His wisdom, His righteousness are always faithful.”

Yes, you never know what kind of strange twists there will be in life. We plan and obsess and dream, but we never know where life will lead us. There are a lot of things that are just totally out of our hands, but I try to find peace in them through my trust and faith in God, who is eternal and faithful and unchanging.

Hm. Sorry to be all somber. I swear I’m not gloomy or depressed or anything! Just…reflective.

Speaking of unpredictability, this Los Angeles weather has the mood of a pubescent teenage girl! Last week, it was chilly, foggy, and windy. It drizzled like the tears of a petulant baby for two days straight. And today, the sun is shining bright and fierce in the 80’s, as if it’s making a forced, aggressive grin. 

Last week on Sunday, it was yet another chilly day, and after church service, everyone just wanted something warm and hearty. This being downtown L.A. where there is not a Panera in sight (WTF?), our general consensus was ramen.

A huge group of us trooped down to Daikokuya in Little Tokyo, in search of apparently the best ramen in Los Angeles. Unfortunately, the line in Daikokuya was outrageous, and there was no way the 20-something of us could fit in there. So we headed to the ramen shop nearby:
IMG_0863 Mr. Ramen. Seriously? Mr. Pizza, and now Mr. Ramen? Asians come up with the hokiest name! –___-;;;
IMG_0866 Anyway. Cheesy name aside, the place was pretty cozy, decorated just like a welcoming little Japanese home, which was a pleasant sight especially when we were all chilled to the bone.
IMG_0867 There were even stacks of manga! (I used to read and draw my own manga, until I decided that manga was sexist and treated women like honeymelon-breasted sex objects)
IMG_0865 We totally filled up the whole place, us Christian Students!
IMG_0864 These two lovebirds in front are engaged and are gonna have their wedding soon~

Anyway. The menu was very limited to just ramen and curry rice, with a few other choices, which was a good sign that this house really knew their ramen.

I ordered the soy soup ramen:
IMG_0870 Wow! The bowl was twice the size of my head! And look at all the seaweed in there! I approve! >.<
IMG_0871 The only thing I wasn’t happy about was the egg: hard-boiled? And just a tiny quarter? Come on! >:-6

But I loved the pieces of pork in there:
IMG_0874 It wasn’t fatty and greasy like the one I had at Ippudo in NYC, but full of tender meat that just literally melted in my mouth.
IMG_0873 And the noodles were nice and chewy and springy, just the way I like it.

Everyone ate with gusto:
IMG_0872 However, I noticed once again that I was the only one who ate my ramen the “right and polite” way. Yes, I was the only one who made slurping noises!

Some of my friends ordered a half-size portion of ramen with a plate of curry rice:
IMG_0868 That red thing there is pickles! I didn’t try it, but apparently it was good.

I was a bit worried about the price, but Mr. Ramen turned out to be just half the price of Ippudo. Awesome! But I didn’t get to pay. Someone else grabbed the tab before I did. I’m not sure who, but a big thank you to the generous ramen-buyer! :-)

Another thank you to the Heart Thrive peeps who sent me this package:
IMG_0856 Look at the selection! They are all made with whole-grains, with 30% Daily Protein, Fiber & Calcium and suitable for vegans:
IMG_0857

  • Apricot
  • Date
  • Cranberry
  • Lemon Poppyseed
  • Apple
  • Chocolate

Now, I’ve got to be honest. On my first bite, I really did not like it. The taste was so raw; it was like eating uncooked oats or dough. It turned into dry crumbly paste in my mouth, and I had to choke it down.
IMG_0858 The second time, I warmed a Cranberry one up in the microwave for about 20 seconds:
IMG_0859 Much better! Now it was actually edible, and tasted quite good! This was the Lemon Poppyseed one.
 IMG_0898 The third time, I tried grilling it on my George Foreman:
IMG_0876Ooh~ Is there anything Mr. GF cannot do? I loved how it was nice and crispy outside, but warm and soft inside. Yum!

And yet another time, I microwaved a Date one again, but added a bit of syrup on top for extra moistness:
IMG_0909 I ate this with a fork like a cake. A dainty, pretty, heart-shaped cake. I think this was my favorite way to eat it.

Thank you, Mark, for this opportunity to try a new ultra-healthy snack!

Okay, I’ve chatted enough. I hope you all have a great weekend! :D

Question of the day: What was the most unpredictable thing life threw at you? It can be good or bad, serious or funny.

Categories: God · My story · USC · eating disorders · eating out · product review
Tagged: , , , , , , , ,

Just a Shadow

September 11, 2009 · 95 Comments

For those of you who have been reading since the start of this blog, or if you look at my About Me page, you’ll know that I started this blog as a sort of “treatment center” for me to fight my eating disorder…And for the past month or so, you might have noticed that I don’t really talk much about my eating disorder anymore.

Well, the simple truth is, I just don’t have much to say about it anymore. Why? Because it isn’t part of my life now. Take note that I am not saying I am completely healed. But it’s no longer dominant. There used to be a time when I would wake up feeling eating disordered, and go to sleep feeling eating disordered. The two letters ‘ED’ rang in my mind, poking me and taunting me in every single action and speech I made.

But now, I no longer care for it. Quite simply, I have many other things to think about that is much more significant and meaningful to me than my eating disorder.

Again, I am not saying that I am quitting, or that I am no longer fighting. The thing is, I don’t even have to fight or struggle that hard anymore. I just…simply don’t get all those irrational fears and anxieties anymore, and if they do come occasionally, it takes just a few shrugs to brush it off.

My dad once told me that one day, ED will be like a distant dream to me. At that moment, I felt my heart clench with longing and desire— I wanted that day to come so desperately, but I did not have any spark of hope that it will. And now…I believe I am very close. ED is but a shadow in my life. There are still remnants of it lingering from time to time, but the light inside of me is getting brighter and brighter, chasing the darkness away.

One key evidence is the ease with which I dine with others. Gone are the days when I would freak out over a social eating days in advance. Even if a social event is sprung upon me by surprise, I can comfortably abandon my plans and follow along.

Sunday was one example of that. After church service, a bunch of girls asked me out for lunch. I actually had something else in mind that day, but I said “yes” immediately, simply for the reason to socialize…like any normal person would!

And guess where we went?
IMG_0433 CURRY HOUSE in Little Tokyo! Remember that time I went there and had a divine lunch with my parents? I was so thrilled to be able to visit it again!

This time, I ordered the Chili Shrimp and Spinach Pasta:
IMG_0434 Shrimp, spinach and onion in spicy chili flavor with Spaghetti
IMG_0436 Eee! Divine! I forgot to ask them to make it as spicy as possible though, so it certainly wasn’t hot enough for me. Thus I dunked tons of Tabasco sauce on top, shocking the hell out of my new church friends. Don’t mind me, just being Korean…
IMG_0437
By the way, I think I found my church. I really enjoyed the Sunday’s message. I had goosebumps all over; the message was so powerful! Also, my new friends are pretty awesome! One of them also grew up in Singapore, and guess what? She whipped out her camera with me, too! How cool is that? A potential food-blogger, perhaps? ;-)

Anyway. There is another reason why I should hang out with them more. They have cars. Haha! We might be making a Trader Joe trip sometime, and of course downtown for more good eats!

Sadly, the food options in my own school’s campus seems to be limited without a car.

See, I’ve also been exploring other dining options in my campus with my friends. On Wednesday, my friend Yoomi called me out for lunch out of the blue, and we went to this on-campus cafe called Popovich.

Obviously, the Smoked Turkey Wrap caught my eye:
IMG_0458 Smoked turkey, orange-infused cream cheese, cranberry chutney, and spinach in a spinach wrap, done Panini-style. Side of pasta salad and pickle.
IMG_0460 Orange-infused cream cheese? Cranberry chutney? How could I refuse?
IMG_0461 Unfortunately, there was too much spinach and too little cheese and chutney. They were skimpy on the two most interesting ingredients, so this wrap turned out…quite unremarkable. Sad.
IMG_0459 The pasta salad weren’t that great, either. Not a fan of cold pasta or dressing…

And all those people who have been telling me Parkside Dining hall is better than EVK? They were WRONG!
IMG_0464 Mimi and I met up yesterday afternoon for lunch at the dining hall next to my apartment.
IMG_0465 It was the first time I was dining here, and I see I haven’t been missing much.
IMG_0470
Parkside looks nice and polished, but I can’t say the same for their food:
IMG_0466 Turkey burger, Mango chicken, Indian-stewed vegetables, salad, fruit.
IMG_0468
Blegh. The mango chicken had a great sauce, but the chicken was overcooked and tough. 
IMG_0469 The turkey burger was completely inedible. I had to get another cheeseburger:
IMG_0471 And this was almost as horrible. Dry, tasteless, bland. Even the cheese. I thought processed cheese was supposed to at least have some kind of taste with all the crap they put in there.
IMG_0467 The stewed vegetables were all right, but too greasy and heavy.

To “get my money’s worth” from this completely unsatisfactory (and expensive for $10.25) lunch, I loaded up on two of these ice-cream cones:
IMG_0472
Even the cones were tiny! Rip-offs! >:-(

I might have also snuck out with some fruits. ;-p

Ah, well. You can’t always have fabulous meals all the time. Too bad I have 49 more meals I’m forced to eat in Parkside. Boo.

Anyway, I’m glad it’s a weekend! Weekends didn’t mean anything to me before, but now it’s such a pleasure to have a couple of days off! I guess this goes to prove that we need a little tough moments (or bad food) in our life to make us appreciate the good moments (or yummy food)!

Question of the day: Why did you start your blog? Has the purpose/motivation for your blog changed over time?

P.S. Check out Mimi’s post on her revelation on calorie-counting and her recipe for her Hotshot Creamy Cuke Sammie!

Categories: My story · blog meet-up · eating disorders · eating out
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Pampered

August 21, 2009 · 93 Comments

I just hung up after speaking with my parents, and here I am sitting on my new desk, sipping on a fresh-brewed cup of Vanilla-biscotti coffee, and relishing the first few moments of the start to my life as an independent college student…

My dad’s last “sermon” to me is still ringing clear in my mind: “Just be happy today, each day. Because whatever circumstances and situation you are in, it is the perfect moment God has arranged for you, and that moment will never come back. So just enjoy every single moment!”

And then he ended with the usual “I love you, call often, eat well, bye bye.”

I’ll miss my parents. I’ll miss them a freaking lot. But now is the beginning of a new chapter in my life, and just like my dad said, I shall enjoy each and every single moment of it, the good and the bad.

The last four days with my parents have been amazing, though. My parents love my campus, and my new room, so much that for the past two nights we’ve just been cooking dinner in my apartment. Mostly oatmeal and eggs, because after all the fast food and heavy food both my parents and I start craving a good ol’ bowl of oats in the evening.

I feel rather bad, because for the past few days my parents have practically become my chauffeur and maid. I’ve been dragging them around the city everywhere to buy all my essentials and to stock up my kitchen, and spending so much money! Yesterday I wanted my parents to just go off by themselves to have their own little “vacation” but they refused and insisted on spending the whole day with me again. Awww…Of course I gladly accepted, because hey, I want to enjoy being pampered for as long as I can get! ;-)

So these are the places we’ve shopped in during the last couple of days:

  • Korean supermarket
  • Walmart
  • Costco
  • Trader Joe’s
  • Whole Foods
  • Japanese market
  • Grand Central Market (DEFINITELY visiting again!)
  • K-Mart (It SUCKS! NEVER go there ever ever ever!)
  • Ross
  • Dollar-Dollar Bargain Center

Phew! I’ve certainly been on a rapid shopping spree! But even now, my kitchen is still seriously under-stocked, and there’s still some supplies I need to get for my room. I had no idea there are so freaking many necessities one needs! Humans are fussy creatures!

My room is still unorganized, but I’ll update you with pictures once my roommate moves in (tomorrow) and we are both settled in. :-)

So, what have we been eating to fuel up? Well, tons of fast food…But it’s been some great training for me…I sure can’t be a picky food snob anymore when I’m a poor college student! Besides…fast food is pretty damn tasty (Shh! Don’t tell anyone I said that)!

Anyway, the day before we finally managed to wake up early enough for some McDonald’s breakfast:
IMG_0256 Sausage McMuffin with Egg. Too freaking yummy. Darn that MSG and artificial crap that makes food taste good!

For some reason I wasn’t craving pancakes that morning, so I had the McMuffin instead. But come afternoon, our minds were screaming heresy for not ordering the hotcakes in McDonald’s, so we had lunch at IHOP.

I ordered the Harvest Grains ‘N Nuts Pancakes Healthy Combo:
IMG_0260 Pancakes made with hearty grains, wholesome oats, almonds, English walnuts, and blueberries. Topped with bananas. With 2 poached eggs.
IMG_0262 This actually comes with scrambled eggs, but I substituted poached eggs because as you know, I love my runny yolks!
IMG_0263 If you ever go to IHOP, GET THIS because it is freaking awesome! Drizzle on that syrup, and you’ve got one wholesome, sweet and savory meal!

But of course, we didn’t subsist only on chain restaurants. What is the fun of that? Knowing my obsession for European-Japanese cuisine, one of my dearest friends who is a former USC student recommended a little restaurant in Little Tokyo called Curry House:
IMG_0265
It’s situated in Weller Court Shopping Centre, a little hub of Japanese stores. I let my parents take a look at the menu, and I swear I’ve never seen them so excited!
IMG_0266 The place is really chic and modern with bright colors, and most of the servers were Japanese.

My dad, the ultimate seafood and pasta lover, of course ordered the Seafood & Wiener Jambalaya Style Curry:
IMG_0267Brimming with scallops, shrimp, squid, white fish, wiener & vegetables in a rich tomato stock. Made extra-extra-extra hot per request, of couse, and the rice was substituted with spaghetti.
IMG_0268 Holy shit. It was SO freaking GOOD!!! For those of you who have never tried Japanese curry, it is a lot different from the Indian or Thai kind. Theirs is really thick, and more sweet than spicy. But this curry, though it retained the Japanese curry characteristics, was ramped up with Cajun spices. YUM holy YUM!

My mom took a long time deciding because she wanted everything (tsk, tsk) but finally she chose the Keema Curry:
IMG_0269 Ground beef with onion, Shimeji mushroom, carrots, potatoes, garlic, red chili and soft-boiled egg. Served with brown rice.
IMG_0270 I loved that they have brown rice options! This dish was really delicious too, though it was not as spicy and a tad bit sweeter than my dad’s dish. And I love how the Japanese like to top a lot of their dishes with a soft-boiled egg! Yum!

As for me, I went for something totally unexpected by ordered the Tarako Mayo:
IMG_0272 Onions and Shimeji mushrooms with cod roe and mayonnaise sauce in spaghetti.
IMG_0273 I’m not usually a big fan of mayonnaise, but Japanese mayo is just…fabulous. And the sauce in this was SO awesome! It was so rich and creamy, but not cloying at all because of the tang of the mayonnaise.
IMG_0274 And LOVE the cod roe in there! It’s got a gritty texture, sort of like cornmeal for some crunch factor, but much softer, and when you bite into it, it releases sweet juices into your mouth and OH EM GI! You’ll have total gastronomic orgasm!
IMG_0275There was also a pot of some kind of red Japanese pickles which was sweet and crunchy and sour at the same time:
IMG_0276 The three of us were greedy and actually finished the whole pot! Oops! :D

I was stuffed to the brim after finishing my dish (and stealing huge bites from my parents’ plates) because the serving size was way too generous, but we still ordered a dessert because nothing is better than Japanese desserts. We got the Sweet Potato Cake with Ice Cream:
IMG_0277 If you’re wondering why it is yellow in color that’s because Japanese sweet potatoes aren’t orange. They’re yellow, and a million times superior in taste to the normal orange ones. They’ve got a deep, intense flavor, like roasted chestnuts.
IMG_0278 The cake was actually more like a thick, dense, pureed sweet potato! I couldn’t taste the flour, and it was rich and creamy in my mouth. So good! The ice cream was just your basic vanilla. It was okay. Too sweet, in my opinion.

Oh, and did you know they also have another Curry House in that same shopping centre?
IMG_0264 It’s a small To-Go place though, for those in a rush or for the cheapskates who don’t wanna pay tip (that might be me in the future).

I was ecstatic to find that there is a bus that comes here from my school. I shall most definitely visit again, preferably with friends!

Okay, one more thing I want to share and then I’ll shut up and be done. Anyone in LA been to the Grand Central Market?
IMG_0280 Apparently it is LA’s largest and oldest open-air market. There are over 38 merchants selling all sorts of produce, delicacies, and unique specialty items…and the prices are SO cheap! A whole container of figs and strawberries for a freaking $1!! And grapes for 99 cents per 2 pounds! YAHOO!!
IMG_0281 There were also lots of food vendors selling delicious-smelling foods like burritos, chicken rotisserie, frozen yogurt, Korean-Mexican fusion, Japanese teriyaki, overstuffed pupusas, etc…It was a pity I was too stuffed to eat anything, though I did consider getting the froyo. Well, there’s always a next time! :-)

Okay, I’m running out of time…Gotta run again for Welcome Week stuff…My posts may be sporadic for a while, but I promise to return to blog as often as I can. I hope to be able to work out a schedule as I get adjusted to my weekly routine.

Till I return, please take care and remember to enjoy every moment of your life! :D

P.S. Take a look at this article on orthorexia…It’s scary.


Categories: My story · eating out · family · fear food
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

How to make a blogger happy

July 28, 2009 · 109 Comments

Wheeeeeeee!!!! I’m a very happy blogger today! I’ve got tons of pictures to share, and I am filled to the brim with good food and great fun!

First of all, can I say how much I love New York City? Yes, it’s dirty and creepy. Yes, it’s got a permanent stink and the traffic crawls along like a limp frog. Yes, the people are rather unfriendly and sulky.

But I adore the warm bustle and never-ending hum of the city, the busy pedestrians of assorted ethnicity marching across in all directions, the absolute contempt for traffic stoplights, the efficient public transportation, the many eclectic hole-in-the-wall restaurants and shops…It is quite an exciting city! It’s the kind of place in which you wish you never needed to sleep, because there is just that much going on.

At my blogger meet-up with Karena from Run, Eat, Repeat and Rebecca from All Vegged Out, Karena recommended visiting the Chelsea Market. Chelsea market is an indoor food-shopping mall, and home of many Food Network offices. It’s also where Iron Chef America and Emeril Live was shot! How freaking cool is that? Of course I had to make a trip there!
DSC02330At first glance, I was surprised by how run-down the building looked. But as I got closer I realized that was just the design of the building…It was designed to be artistic, hip, and urbane.
DSC02331 Welcome to the Chelsea Market!
DSC02332 Inside, I was amazed and entranced by the interior decorations. It was so unique and interesting. Glossy, yet not tacky at all.
DSC02346 It has got that historic industrial look and feel, if you know what I mean.
DSC02349There was even a small fountain, and people threw pennies and dimes into the pool for good luck:
DSC02339Seriously, I was like a kid in Candyland. My tongue was hanging out with eagerness and I sprinted from one place to the other, eyes wide with wonder. First place I hit was Eleni’s, a bakery that sells hand-painted art cookies and cupcakes:
DSC02333 This one was my favorite:
DSC02334How adorable! But pricey for $2.50 each!

We also checked out the Fat Witch Bakery, but they wouldn’t let us snap pictures, so I stole a sample brownie out:
DSC02335 Moist, rich, ooh la la-decadent!

And check this out:
DSC02336A burger? No, it’s a cake!

Next I stopped by Amy’s Bread:
DSC02337 I couldn’t resist buying something:
DSC02356
A mini-loaf of whole wheat walnut bread, and two semolina-fennel rolls.

The Lobster Place:
DSC02338 And Buon Italia, the source for all things Italian!
DSC02340 Sweet little fruit-shaped marzipans
DSC02341 Of course I zoomed into the gnocchi section!
DSC02342 $2.35 for a package of spinach-potato gnocchi…Score!
DSC02343 I really wanted this kooky-shaped pasta, but the price was way too high…:-(
DSC02344 And a GIANT tub of Nutella! I took a shot of this just for our very own Nutella Queen, Debbie!

We also hit by Sarabeth’s Kitchen:
DSC02347 Only $1? I couldn’t resist buying this jar of cranberry relish for future sandwiches…
DSC02348 And look at this cute little baby pineapple I found at the Manhattan Fruit Exchange!
DSC02345 After all this touring of food, we got really, really hungry. There were also a few restaurants in Chelsea Market that boasted really scrumptious menus, but we already had a place in mind…
DSC02350 Ever heard of Ippudo? Apparently it’s got the best ramen in New York, so we decided to pay it a visit to see what the fuss is all about.
DSC02352 I was immediately impressed by the chic decorations:
DSC02355But not so the dim yellowish lighting. Boooo for photography!! I think every restaurant should fix their lighting with food bloggers in mind, don’t you agree?
DSC02360 We started off with an appetizer which Jane treated:
DSC02361 Hirata buns, which is a pillowy white steamed bun filled with mayo, spicy chicken, and lettuce.
DSC02362 
The bun was so soft and spongy and delicious! But I didn’t care much for the chicken inside…who leaves the rubbery skin on? Urgh, I can’t stand the pimply chicken skin unless it’s fried.

Jane ordered the miso ramen:
DSC02365 Soy bean paste ramen noodles soup, the “originial tonkatsu” based soup with sliced berkshire pork, minced pork, cabbage and scallions
DSC02366 I ordered the shoyu ramen:
DSC02363 Soy sauce flavored ramen noodles soup, a combination of chicken and tonkatsu soup, with slice of bershire pork, naruto, egg, cabbage, and scallions
DSC02364 The best way to eat it? First sip a spoonful of the rich, meaty, greasy broth…
DSC02367 And then pinch a bunch of springy ramen noodles with your chopsticks and sluuuuurrrrp it up! Ramen is one dish in which you are required to make a lot of noise! So, slurp slurp slurp!
DSC02371Jane was too polite to slurp though…I was like a pig next to her, slurping with gusto while she daintily ladled her noodles into her spoon and nibbled.
DSC02372But seriously. BEST NOODLE SOUP ever!!! I’ve never tried ramen so I’m not to judge, but if there is a better ramen than this, you bet I’ll be there faster than Sonic the Hedgehog!
DSC02370 I didn’t care much for the pork slices, though. It was just way too…porky and meaty and stinky, if you know what I mean.
DSC02373 Aaaaah…I am so contented right now, I can’t seem to wipe the silly beam off my face. Amazing food, great company, new adventures and experiences in a cool city…this is life!

Can you believe just half a year ago I locked myself in my own house, refusing to venture out except to exercise all my non-existent “fat” away, scared shitless of new adventures and challenges? I am so freaking glad I have finally popped out of my ED bubble.

And yes, I call it a bubble…because when you’re in that bubble, you are a delicate little thing, and just to reach through that thin watery wall seems to be the end of the world. Trapped in that bubble, the world outside seems so scary and skewed. But really, all it takes is one giant leap out, and that bubble will pop you free. I used to think it was impossible, but now I realize that it really is not such a big deal. One pop is all it takes! So reach out and grab for your future and life!

Question of the day: Do you make a lot of noise when you eat? I ask because being Korean, I slurp and chew and munch louder than a cow. But I know it’s not really polite in western cultures, though it is actually welcomed in Korea!

P.S. There will be a NY blogger meet-up on Thursday, 7pm at Green Pea. It’s at 435 5th Ave, between 38th & 39th Street. I’m announcing it now because a few of you have asked. Anybody is welcome! :-)

Categories: My story · eating disorders · eating out · fear food
Tagged: , , , , , ,

Ma Maison stands up for stereotyped Asians

May 2, 2009 · 61 Comments

To compensate for the lack of foodie pictures on my last post, today’s post will be stacked with a whole bunch of food porn. I cannot wait to share with your the freaking delicious eats I had last night.

But first, a little introduction. Remember I said I was dining at a French-Japanese restaurant called Ma Maison yesterday? I was the one who suggested this venue to my youth group friends (Huijun, Shiya, Mei’er, and Huizhen) after hearing rave reviews about this place. I have never ever really had real French cuisine yet (French fries and croissants don’t count), so I was quite interested in how French-Japanese food would be like.

As soon as we reached the place, I was a bit surprised because the exterior just isn’t what you would expect out of a pretty high-class restaurant (in my standard’s anyway). We were greeted by this shady little wooden man:
DSC02954
How unglamorous! He looked like a French version of KFC’s Colonial. But I was reassured by the looooong line queued outside the restaurant. Singaporeans know their food, and you can never go wrong with a restaurant that attracts this many customers. We had to wait more than an hour to secure a seat!

But finally we were ushered in by an enthusiastic Japanese lady who exclaims “Hai, hai,” in a high, excited breath every minute.

Despite the dubious exterior, the interior decoration was warm, charming, and quaint. It was like walking into an old-fashioned English cottage house or something. Check out some of the oldie decor:
DSC02955 DSC02979
There were also shelves of old dusty books, little vintage ornaments, worn-out crockery, and dim ancient lamps and candles, all creating a very rustic, romantic yet comfortable atmosphere.

The menu was also really cool:
DSC02957
It came out bound in a thick, smooth leather.

But as I perused the menu, I began doubting the restaurant again. Paella? Isn’t that a Spanish dish? Stroganoff? Isn’t that Russian? Carbonara? Isn’t that Italian? So why is does this place have a French name again? But then I shrugged it off.  As long as there’s good food, who cares? Besides, them Europeans always seem to get us Asians mixed up anyways, so why can’t we do the same thing to them? I can just imagine the little Japanese giving a I-can’t-be-bothered shrug and exclaiming, “French, German, Spanish, Russian, Italian, they all look the same to us, so who cares?”

Anyway, back to topic. Of course we had to order the classic French dish, the escargot in garlic butter!

First, the server handed each of us a tiny plate with a tiny fork and pincher:
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There were six escargots which arrived in a hot ceramic plate over a bed of flamed salt:
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We each had a piece:
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I don’t know what I was expecting, but the meat was so succulent and buttery and glided down my throat.
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I guess I thought snails would kinda taste like mussels and clams (which I don’t really care for), but it had none of the fishy taste that I was dreading. Anyway, I was so happy I could finally declare I have officially tried and enjoyed SNAILS!

Next came all our entrees.

I ordered the specialty of the house, the hamburg steak:
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It comes with a perfectly runny fried egg on top, and doused with their famous brown sauce, which they simmer for 28 days!
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The sauce was worth every single day of labor. It was thick, rich, and dark, with a concentrated tangy taste that was so intense without being overwhelming. It was awesome mopped up with the hamburg steak, which was the perfect blend of lean and fatty meat. The meat was so moist that you didn’t need a knife at all, just a fork to slice each piece off like butter, put it into your mouth, and let it glide down your throat, tantalizing every taste bud…
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The deep-fried potatoes that came with it, however, was lackluster. They were luke-warm and soggy! Blech.

Mei’er’s dish was similar to mine, except hers came with melted cheese on top instead of the egg:
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Huijun’s dish was also a hamburg steak, but hers came in a sizzling hot plate. The sauce was also different from mine; hers was sweeter, and they burst into flames as the server poured the dark liquid all over the plate. Way cool!
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Huizhen ordered another specialty of the house, the Beef Stroganoff with Omu-rice:
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The beef came smothered with a very strong dark sauce. It was delicious, but I still preferred my tender hamburg steak.
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The omu-rice, however, was excellent! I loved that the egg was just barely cooked, so still so rich and creamy over the small bed of rice! Yum!
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Shiya ordered the fried salmon-steak:
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Hm. It was good. Nice and fat and juicy, but nothing special.

Oh, check this out:
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It’s the key they give you to act as a bill! Ain’t that nice!

After that we were full, but apparently with room enough for some dessert! We clambered out of Ma Maison and headed to yet another Japanese restaurant, MOF (stands for Ministry of Food).

MOF is a vibrant Japanese family-style “pub” (is that an oxymoron or what?) selling all sorts of Japanese drinks, food, and desserts, but it’s most known for its sweet stuff.

We ordered a different bunch of stuff to share. First, the Matcha Latte:
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This was basically a drink made out of milk and green tea powder. The drink was very fragrant, creamy, and frothy, but the richness was too much for us. After several sips, we were done! It also came with a side dish of sweet chewy jellies, sort of like a Turkish delight:
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Cute, eh?

We also got a Matcha Zen:
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This came in a thick red bean paste, several sticky glutinous rice balls, and a scoop of green tea gelato. It was delicious, though the red bean paste was a bit too sweet for me. The gelato was freaking amazing, though, and I’m not much of an ice-cream lover!

Then there’s this cute bowl:
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The Shiratama Kurian, which is composed of soft serve vanilla ice-cream, kanten jellies, fruits, Japanese rice dumplings, and a dollop of red bean paste.

Wait, there’s more! Three scoops of gelatos on a waffle bowl!
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The flavors were cookies and cream, green tea, and hazelnut. Sorry for the shaky picture, I had to hurry as my friends were diving into it like frantic hyenas over the last scrap of meat! They were all really good, especially the hazelnut, as that flavor was a first for me.

Oh, and last but not least:
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Coffee. Hey, after all that luxurious food, I needed something to perk me up from my food coma. It came with a lovely little nut-encrusted cookie, which I liked because it was barely sweet. Crunchy, brittle, nutty, just the way I like my sweets!

I thought dinner was a smashing success, not because of the yummy food and the terrific company, but the way I handled my ED. Actually, to tell you the truth, I barely even needed to handle him at all! ED was strangely quiet throughout the entire process.

After so many continuous and constant in-your-face challenges, I think ED’s been beaten down pretty bloody. I’ll say he’s in the ICU hooked up to all sort of IV drips and wires and tubes, scared shitless. Rot to hell, ED! He’ll definitely be trying to recover, but I won’t let him. I think right now, I’ve got the upper hand on him. I’m in control now, and ED has no place telling me what to do.

Instead, all I could think about was how freaking blessed and grateful I am to have the beautiful friends I have with me right now. We had the best time together, talking about all sorts of things. We managed to stay humorous and lively, and firmly pushed away all melancholy aside. Tears may come, but it can wait until I’m safely on the plane.

Anyway, I have another piece of rather exciting news to share with you: My pastor asked me to do a testimony in front of the whole church tomorrow! I was glad to be given the last opportunity to share my gratitude to these lovely, amazing brothers and sisters in church before I leave, but I’m also a bit worried. I’m not scared about the public speaking; I’ve had many experiences being on stage already. Rather, I’m worried I wouldn’t be able to say all the things I want to share! There are so much things to tell, and the perfectionist in me don’t want to miss a single detail!

I’ve done a bit of preparation for it, but hopefully tomorrow morning on stage I would have all the points I want to get across in mind and be able to relate them strongly and clearly. Wish me luck, everyone!

Question of the day: Do you get stage fright? Have you ever had to give a speech or perform in front of people? What was it, and how did you survive it? Did you enjoy it?

As I’ve said, I’ve been on the stage a lot of times. When I was young in Singapore, I was like the only Korean girl in school, and during special occasions when the school would organize performances, I always volunteered to do the traditional Korean dance on stage, complete with the several layers of brightly-colored traditional costume and hand-painted fans!

Categories: eating disorders · eating out · fear food
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Why I Burp

March 26, 2009 · 64 Comments

Some people have asked about my e-mail address and blog name. What’s with all this “burping” mania? Why burp? How disgusting/funny/interesting/cool!

There is actually a very valid reason why I choose to use the word “burp.” As embarrassing as this is to confess, I am a huge burper. There. I’ve said it out loud. I burp louder and longer than any big, fat, beer-guzzling, ESPN-watching couch potato out there. I am known far and wide for my burping skills. In fact, when I left Singapore for America, my friends compiled a nice little farewell album for me, in which they all left a sweet message, and every single one of those messages included the sentence, “I will miss your burps!”

Yeah. Not my intelligence, my wittiness, or my absolute fabulosity, but my burps. I’m not exactly thrilled to be identified by my burps, but I’ve come to embrace it.

That said, I don’t burp out of my own will. Why would I ever want to be stuck with an image of social inappropriateness? They just slip out on their own. I blame my genes. Everyone on my dad’s side are burping champions. Seriously. My grandpa’s burping skills put my own to shame.

I remember the one time when I was about 12 and I was visiting Korea, and I was staying at my grandparents’ house. Before I go on, I’ll let you know that I have never been very close to my grandparents, as we lived half the continent away and could only visit once every two years at the most.

One morning, My grandma cooked a big pot of Korean miso soup for breakfast. That put a scowl in my face, because I hated miso soup. Actually, I hated any Asian food, but miso soup was just one of my least favorites, especially the stinky Korean kind. So I sat there picking at my rice and barely touching my bowl of miso soup.

But meanwhile, my grandpa was guzzling it down like it was a bowl of golden nectar from the gods. He slurped up each spoonful noisily, going “AHHH!” and “Mmmm!!” with every mouthful. The sight of him enjoying this simple bowl of miso soup so much made me suddenly crave for the same experience. What the hell is so great about miso? All of a sudden, I, too, wanted to enjoy my miso soup, so I decided to give it another chance.

I picked up my spoon and gave it a cautious taste. And you know what? It tasted magnificent. I don’t know if it was because of my grandpa’s influence or my grandma’s amazing cooking, but I finished every last drop of that miso soup, albeit with less moans of ecstasy than my grandpa.

And at the end of it, we both burped out loud in unison. My grandma shook her head in disgust, muttering, “Like grandfather, like granddaughter.” But my grandpa and I shared a secret smile, and at that moment I suddenly felt myself sharing a close kinship and bond with him.

Here’s the sad part of the story, though. My grandpa just passed away last year due to stomach cancer. Because at that time I was still severely underweight, I was unable to attend his funeral. I regret it so much and it weighs heavy in my heart that he died without seeing me fully recovered. Up until his very last breath, he worried for my health even while he himself was at his own death bed.

But I take comfort in the thought that he is now up there in heaven, rooting me on as I fight my way through recovery. Grandpa, this lunch today is in memory of you:

Miso Pilaf

The base: 1 cup cooked pearl barley

The mix-ins: 1/4 cup black beans, 1/2 cup chopped roasted winter squash, sliced crabmeat (imitation)

The dressing: miso paste mixed with water

The toppings: sprinkle of furikake (dehydrated seaweed and fish and sesame seeds) and a sunny-side egg

This is just another variation of my “Mix-it-up” bowl again, starting out by sautéing onions and garlic first, then dumping in the base and mix-ins, then the dressing, and finally ladling the mixture into a bowl with the toppings.
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I have to say, no miso was ever as good as that bowl I had with my grandpa. I soon returned back to avoiding miso soups, but no longer harbored the same distaste I had for it before then.
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This bowl of miso pilaf was warm, comforting, and satisfying. I kept the water to the bare minimum so that the broth was thicker and more gravy-like than normal liquidy miso soup.
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It was simple, much less fancy than my other “Mix-it-up” bowl creations, but still very, very good. Highly recommended for any cold nights, or if in need of some major comforting.
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Some awesome news today!

1. Kiki tried out my “Mix-it-up” bowl! Hers was a Greek-Italian fusion,  and these were her mix-ins: 1 cup cooked barley, splash of EVOO, 1/4 cup feta, Sicilian lentil pasta sauce, and kalamata olives. Gosh, that sounds so yummy! This is Kiki’s response to her “Mix-it-up” bowl creation: “Not attractive, but yumskies.” I beg to differ, Kiki, but yours looked amazing! Check out her blog for the delicious-looking picture!

2. And now, a huge standing ovation is in order for

JIAYING of Brownbread girl! She managed to identify

every single fruit in my header-banner! The correct answer was: kiwi, pear, dragonfruit, orange, and grapefruit! I’m pretty impressed, I must say! Great job, Jiaying!

3. I really liked the Q&A section last time, so I’m opening up to any more questions today! I might even make that every Thursday’s question of the day.

So, before you leave, guys, remember to ask me any questions you want! I promise to answer them!

Buai buai, and until next time!

P.S. Carrots and Cake is having a PURE BAR GIVEAWAY! I’ve always been a great fan of her blog, but now she’s given me all the more reason to love it even more! Go check out her blog for details!

Categories: "mix-it-up" bowl
Tagged: , , , , , , ,

The Yin and Yang of it all

March 23, 2009 · 47 Comments

I’ve noticed a trend in my lunches. I always have an eggy dish one day, then grains/beans the next. Egg, pilaf, egg, pilaf. But I’ve still managed to avoid any repetitious dishes, thanks to the versatility of eggs and my “Mix-it-up” bowl. Though I use the same base ingredients and method, the result is always something fresh, innovative, and different. I’m interested to see how many different variations “Mix-it-up” bowls I can come up with. So far, I’ve come up with five:

I’ve still got a whole list of other variations I want to try, so you can expect to see more of this in the upcoming future! I wonder if I can get up to more than 50 variations. Hmm…Anyone have any creative suggestions of their own?

So anyway, following this unintended trend of egg/pilaf cycle, I had eggs for lunch yesterday. I had lunch out with Jingwen, and of course we chose our favorite, Shokudo. And, obviously, I just had to order my favorite dish, the Japanese omelet. Excuse me for being boring and sticking to the same thing, but it is so good! I do switch up on the fillings, though. This time I chose sakura ebi, which is tiny dried shrimps.

To make up for my boring, repetitious dish, I took pictures of the steps to making a good Japanese omelet:

First, start off with a well-oiled square pan…
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Ladle in the egg mixture (which is seasoned with dashi broth and sugar)…

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Once slightly cooked, roll it up to the corner…
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Then ladle in another layer of egg mixture with chosen filling…
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My filling that day was sakura ebi…
DSC02291 When the second egg layer is cooked, roll it up over the first egg roll…
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And ta-da! The finished product, drizzled with okonomiyaki sauce and mayo, and sprinkled with bonito flakes.
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Unfortunately, the guy cooking this was cooking two omelets at the same time…

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So he failed to devote 100% of his efforts and attention to my omelet, as he should. My omelet, instead of being cooked just right to a soft, creamy texture, was overcooked to crispy dryness. Bad. But the worse thing is that this guy was stingy!! There were barely any shrimp in my omelet, and the amount of toppings on it was miserable. Argh! I hate stingy cooks! Cooks should never, ever be stingy with their food! He was a tall, wiry guy, so maybe what they say about never trusting a skinny chef is true…But wait, I am skinny myself. But then, I don’t call myself a chef. Anyway, as you can see, my omelet this time was infuriatingly unsatisfactory. I still ate it, albeit with a disgruntled scowl like this: >:-(

To prove my point, this was the piece with the most sakura ebi I could find:

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How disappointing. What an anorexic lunch. Boo hoo.

Jingwen ordered the omu-rice (fried rice in omelet), which was so much better than mine. I stole a few bites:
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But thankfully, to make up for yesterday’s disappointing lunch, today’s lunch was freaking amazing! As mentioned above, I came up with another variation of my “Mix-it-up” bowl. This time the combinations were really interesting, “complicated”, and fun. Here’s what went into this bowl:

Yin-Yang Pilaf

The base: 1 cup cooked pearl barley

The mix-ins: 1/4 cup black beans and 1/2 cup chopped roasted winter squash
The dressing: The leftover marinade I used for my roasted veggies with a dash of cinnamon (see below for ingredients)
The topping: Roasted, marinated vegetables, fresh raw cucumbers, dollop of garlic cream cheese, dollop of homemade spicy almond sauce (be patient, recipe follows soon!)

I marinated chopped eggplant, green bell pepper, and tomatoes with this marinade mixture: soy sauce, sake, maple syrup, fish sauce, salt and pepper. Then I popped them into a 400 degree oven to roast for about 20 minutes.

Meanwhile, I whipped up my spicy almond sauce:

– 4 tablespoons roasted almonds
- 2 tablespoons soy sauce
- 1 tablespoon fish sauce
- 1 tablespoon homemade ketchup
- 1 small de-seeded bird-eye chili
- 2 tablespoons blackcurrant preserves
- 3 tablespoons water
- 3 tablespoons almond milk with drop of coconut extract (my last-minute substitution for coconut milk)
- 1 tablespoon sweetener
- salt and pepper
Phew! Sounds like a lot, but it really was very fast and simple! I just dumped all of it into my mini-blender and liquidized the whole thing. Then I stir-fried my barley/black bean/winter squash pilaf with onions and garlic in the marinade with cinnamon, and once it was done, dumped the contents into a bowl, and topped it off with the roasted marinated veggies, a sliced cucumber, cream cheese, and the spicy almond sauce. Voila~!
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Now can you guess why I’m calling this bowl Yin-Yang Pilaf? What a myriad of tastes and textures!

Here’s the yin:
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Cool, refreshing, crunchy cucumbers with tangy garlic cream cheese, soothing and mellow on the palate…

And then there’s the yang:
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Spicy, complicated, intricate tastes and textures. We’ve got the smoky, bold flavor of the marinated vegetables, and the spicy, nutty kick of the almond sauce. Stimulating and warm on the palate…

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The spicy almond sauce was seriously freaking amazing. I modeled this after a peanut dressing recipe, and am loving the almonds much more. It has that buttery, roasty flavor, with a hint of coconut, and the kick from the chili. Perfect blend, if I say so myself. I have a bit left over that I am excited to try on other stuff. Any suggestions?

I know this might seem like a mess of contrasting flavors in this bowl, but just like yin yang symbol, the whole dish was quite harmonized and well-balanced.
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I ate half of this bowl tentatively, scooping up the contents with just bits of the sauce…
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But then ended up just mixing the whole thing together like this:
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It was way better eaten this way. Yum!

DSC02316 So, have I converted anyone yet? You’ve got to try this “Mix-it-up” bowl concept for yourself! If you ever do create something using this basic recipe, please let me know, and I’ll feature it on my blog.

Now, since we’re on the subject of yin and yang, today’s question is: Are you a yin or a yang personality? According to Wikipedia, Yin is black, female, receptive, yielding, negative, and nurturing. It is associated with night, valleys, rivers, streams, water, metal, and earth. Yang is white, male, active, dominating, positive, and initiating/creating. Yang is associated with day, mountains, hills, fire, wood, and air.

I am quite definitely a yang. I like leadership, I like being in control, and am active and outspoken in my opinions and thoughts. But I have a bit of yin inside me too, I guess, as I can be a pretty pessimistic person. I’m trying to change this about myself, as well as learning to be more relaxed and not so domineering.

So, what about you? Are you a yin or a yang personality? I’d love to know!

Categories: "mix-it-up" bowl
Tagged: , , , , , , , ,

I have a dream…

March 19, 2009 · 60 Comments

I remember writing my first article ever to be printed in hard copy when I was a junior in high school. I had just joined the school newspaper staff, and was assigned my first article ever: to review a local Japanese sushi restaurant. It was nothing much, just a small section in the entertainment section, and the contents were barely impressive; just your basic amateur reviewer heaping glowing raves because she is just so ecstatic to have her name printed and has yet to master the art of true criticism.

I progressed from there on, being promoted from staff writer to entertainment editor, and writing many more articles other than restaurant reviews. Even so, I still loved writing reviews most, and tried to grab any chance I could get on writing any review articles, be it food, music, movies, or books.

Another type of writing I loved most was features. I loved interviewing people, talking to them and listening to them talk, digesting the bits and bites of their personal details to form a full, organized picture of their story to the readers.

It was from this stint in my school newspaper that I eventually decided what I wanted to do the most was to interact with people, to write about them, and to experience and observe all sorts of things to share my opinion and thoughts on them. So, I chose to be a journalist. That is my goal, my passion. My plan was to graduate with a degree in magazine journalism in the Medill School of Journalism at Northwestern University, then find a prestigious internship at some magazine company, then get my masters degree at Columbia University. Big plans, great dreams.

Then anorexia struck. Long story short: I got into Northwestern with a full scholarship, but got hospitalized and was sent back home just a month later. I gained some weight and tried to return to school, but they required me to have proof of treatment at an eating disorder residence, which I refused (and had no money for). I reapplied to other schools, and got into University of Southern California. But before I could actually attend, I relapsed and had to postpone my enrollment to Spring semester. Spring rolled by, but I had barely gained any weight; in fact, I lost even more. So I asked permission for another delay…and that brings me to now, where I am still waiting for their decision. It is highly probable that they will say no, as I am being re-evaluated among all the other freshmen. Thing is, I am no longer “fresh.” I am almost 22 years old; it’s been more 3 years since I last touched a textbook.

Meanwhile, I am still…still trying to recover. At this weight, even if the school re-admitted me, I would not be able to attend. It’s a sobering, terrifying thought, one that grips me with icy fear and panic. Will I make it? Will I ever be able to fulfill my dreams to be a great journalist?

As I pray to God about this, He comforts me. He opens my eyes to discover that I don’t need a college degree to become a good journalist. Hell, I’m getting all the training I can get right now with all the experiences He has provided me. I give thanks to Him for letting me discover the blogging community. While blogging I practice my writing skills so they don’t go rusty, while meeting many incredible people and reading their stories and their own struggles.

Most of all, I have discovered the power of the internet. Gone are the days of newspapers, magazines, even radio and broadcast. Now is the age of the wireless, of the citizen writer. Everyone can be a journalist now. Writing and sharing online is even more interactive, efficient, and rewarding. Thus I have switched my choice of major from magazine journalism to online journalism.

If I ever get into college, that is. Which is one of the reason I’m still clinging and fighting. I have a passion, God gave me that passion, and I am going to fulfill that passion, damn it!

So it is in that spirit that I made today’s lunch: in memory of my first article ever to be printed about sushi (albeit in a crappy high school newspaper), I present to you: “I’m going to California” roll.
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It’s called that because it’s has most of the components of a California roll: crabmeat (imitation), carrots, cucumbers. And because so help me God, I am going to USC (University of Southern California)!!!! The only thing that’s missing though, is avocado, which I left out because 1) It’s expensive and I am mega-broke, and 2) I dislike avocadoes. Always have. Love the color, hate the texture and blandness.

I made two rolls. Both had a crabmeat salad, carrots, and cucumbers, but one had pearled barley as the base and the other had the roasted winter squash.
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Here are the ingredients that went into the crabmeat salad:imitation crabmeat, plain yogurt, cucumber-garlic cheese spread, salt and pepper.

For the sushi barley “rice”: pearled barley, splash of vinegar, sweetener, salt.

Sorry, no exact measurements, I just taste-and-tested as I went.

It’s amazing how clean and fresh these tasted even though made mainly from leftovers.
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Heh heh. These are the “Rejects” that were too ugly to make it into the previous picture. Don’t worry, they still got “first place” in my stomach. I ate them up first.

Here’s a close-up of the one with the barley:
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And another one of the roasted winter squash:
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One fat roll having a nice bath in soy sauce:
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I think I liked the one with roasted squash more, but the barley one had great chewy texture.

The colors are so bright and cheery, I decided to go with a more somber tone with this one to match my above story…
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One of the perks of not being in college? Lots of free time to bake! I was baking chocolate-pumpkin swirl cheesecake brownie for a friend’s b-day, and had some leftover brownie batter which I popped into a muffin pan…
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Topped with chocolate-pumpkin cream cheese…
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I’ll try to remember to take a picture of the grand product tomorrow!

Another reason I love the blogging community? Fun, uplifting rewards! Here are not just one, but two blogging awards I received!

This one was from Emily:
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And this one from Katherine Aucoin!

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Thank you, thank you, thank you, Emily and Katherine! You have totally cheered me up when I needed it the most.

Ah, and now comes the dilemma of who I should pass them on to! I’ve been brooding over this for the longest time, and have finally reached the decision…I’m sending the “I <3 your Blog” award to Heather of Heather Eats Almond Butter and Reeni of Cinnamon, Spice & Everything Nice, for their amazing, creative, and delicious recipes!

The “Excellent” award to Ellie of Inside I’m still Dancing and Lexi from Live.Life for their strength and courage in continuing their personal battles. No matter what, you guys are EX-CELLENT little troopers and don’t you ever forget it! Rock on, sisters!

Hmm. Today’s post has been all about me, me, me. But since I’ve already crossed the border to narcissism, why not go all the way? So for today’s question, instead of me asking you lame questions, I’m challenging you to come up with fresher questions for me. Yup, ask me anything, and I shall answer! Seek, and you shall receive! (Except…I draw the line when it comes to asking questions like what’s my credit card PIN number…not that there’s any savings left anyway…)

Categories: Uncategorized
Tagged: , , , , , , , , ,

And the moral of this trip is…

March 8, 2009 · 24 Comments

Aaaah. Home sweet home. Okay, Singapore is not my home and I’m leaving in just two months, but it does sure feel good to be back home. Sorry for the outrageously long post yesterday, and not being able to share more about my reflections back from the Penang trip, but I was quite busy all day, having to unpack my bags, wash all my dirty clothes, restock the fridge, upload my pictures, and finally take a long, hot bath! It was storming yesterday, so the cool weather was such a relief from the smothering heat in Malaysia.

But anyway. I was too occupied with reconciling with my long lost wireless friend the internet last night to be able to sit calmly and think back about the Penang trip, but here I am in a less excited mood with my internet-addict thirst satisfied somewhat.

After last night’s mega-post, I don’t want to overdo tonight by going all deep and sentimental and long-winded, so I’ll keep this into a short and sweet list.

Some Facts I learned from my Penang Trip:


1. A lot of my fears are unaccounted. I’ve been wasting precious energy and emotion fretting and worrying over this trip, but guess what? It turned out pretty well. I did not die, nothing disastrous happened, and though there were tough battles, they were nothing I could not handle. I’ll keep this in mind when ED hurls all sorts of other unaccounted, unreasonable fears at me in the future.

2. Food is not such a big deal. Really. I used to obsess over every meal and every snack, panicking over the calories, worrying about whether it would taste good and thus be “worth” the calories. I still have some of that in me, but this trip to Penang and the continuous social eating has pulled me back a step from this obsessive mentality. It has been good practice to eat socially, because slowly I did not care so much for the food as I cared for enjoyment of the company. I still favor slowly and indulgently savoring a meal in my own privacy, but no longer dread but actually anticipate a good social meal.

3. A bit of junk food here and there is not the end of the world. In fact, they can be downright crappily delicious. I wanna enjoy the occasional “trash food” rather than getting so uptight and anxious that I can’t enjoy it at all.

4. Not everyone is as lucky as me to be able to afford to care about nutrition and daily comforts: My host family is not well-off at all. They’re really struggling financially, actually. They can’t afford the daily luxuries like air-conditioning, hot water, well-stocked kitchen equipment, or better-quality food that I take for granted. In order to make ends meet, they have to cut back on more expensive food expenses, like hotdogs instead of fresh meat and white bread instead of whole grain. And here I am spending twice as much money on Greek yogurt because it tastes better than plain. How incredibly fortunate am I? Before I left, I gave this family a “love gift” of R400.

5. Precious relationships can be formed anywhere you go: I am so thankful for the precious people I meet everywhere, be it America, Singapore, or Malaysia. God has really blessed me with great relationships wherever I go.

6. You can be successful just by excelling in one thing you’re truly passionate about: 3 big mansions? Just by selling good char kway teow in the streets? Seriously?

So there they are. Simple facts that I’d forgotten and of which I need to be reminded. There are more, but then they are more religious and spiritual and more suitable for another blog.

I’ll share more pictures of Penang later, but first, today’s eats!

I had lunch with Jingwen and Serene out today. I was pretty much broke after my Penang trip, and Jingwen was saving up her money to buy a puppy, so we just headed for the food court at Raffles City. I ordered the chicken and beef patty teppanyaki:

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This was an abundant dish, with chicken pieces, a hand-formed beef patty, and bean sprouts fried up teppanyaki-style, and with a sunny-side egg as a bonus!

The chicken was doused with sweet and spicy Japanese curry sauce, while the beef patty was covered with a sticky, sweet teriyaki sauce.

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I thought the egg was perfectly cooked with a lovely, runny yolk. The beef was okay, though the quality was not that good as I came across several suspiciously chewy spots.

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The chicken, however, was quite disgusting. Now I dislike Japanese curry, because it’s sweet and to me curry should be as spicy and fiery as possible. I did not know they were going to smother my chicken with this sauce until it was too late. But the curry wasn’t the problem this time. It was the chicken itself, which was tough and strangely bitter. I could only choke down half of the chicken.

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This meal also came with a seaweed/egg soup:

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Basically tasted like tap water with bits of beaten egg and miserable strands of anorexic seaweed.

Jingwen ordered a smaller portion, just the chicken teppanyaki with white rice:

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The same chicken and curry sauce as mine, except her chicken was much better than mine. I thought they were supposed to taste the same? No fair.

When I got home I said a joyful hello to my old snack-friend, the Mr Bean cheese pancake

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By flaying it alive. I love to torture my pancakes.

Dinner was another hello to an old friend:

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Monte Cristo Sandwiches, soaking up all the maple syrup nectar. And also an otah with which Liwen surprised me:

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Oh, yum. Oh, heaven. Oh, sweet Jesus.

Chomp, chomp, chomp……


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What are you still looking at? Oh, yeah, today’s question of the day: What old-time meals/snacks do you crave the most when you’re out on vacation?

And as promised, some more extra pictures of Penang:

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The Penang mountains…

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Roadside hawker. Since Penang is famous only for its food, I’m just featuring their famous typical street food stalls.

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Penang Recap

March 7, 2009 · 27 Comments

I’m back! Sorry, I didn’t get the chance to continue blogging in Penang like I had hoped to, but I did sort of blog each day, except lacked the wireless service to post it online. Thus, super, super long post today. It’s six-days-all-in-one post, so brace yourselves.

**Just to clear things up, this trip to Penang is not really a vacation. It’s a mission trip with just my church pastor (yes, awkward, but he’s a super cool guy). Our trip is an early embarkment to set up a church in Penang, where we would have daily night sermons. Remember my friend from Penang, Kristine, whom I mentioned in several earlier posts? Well, she and her family would be hosting us at their bungalow home.

The rough daily schedule is: breakfast (by myself, since I’m the only person who wakes up early enough), early lunch out together, whatever social activity planned for the day, rushed “dinner”, then daily sermon at 8pm, which usually ends around 11pm.

03/02/2009: Day One


Man, oh man! First day and it’s already off to a pretty rocky start. I really can’t see myself enjoying this trip much. Call me spoiled, but I’m already aching to fly back to my taken-for-granted daily comforts in Singapore!

But let’s hold off the whines and complaints for a while. First, the good news. I challenged myself and faced my aversion to white rice! We had lunch on the plane, and you guys all know how plane fare is like. Mushy, unidentifiable objects squished and reheated together in a flimsy, environment-polluting aluminum tray. If there are even any veggies at all, they are all cooked to death until soft and brown and devoid of any nutrients. Well, the food I was served on the plane was no different. What’s more, we weren’t even given an option! We were seated at the end of the plane, and this is what the steward said to us in broken English by the time he reached us : “Hello, so sorry ah, we have chicken and beef but no more chicken. Is beef okay for you?”

Um, do I have any other choice? Of course I would have preferred something else, but these were the circumstances and I accepted it. Here’s a quick shot of my charming meal on the plane:

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3 sticks of beef satay, peanut sauce, on top of a bed of nasi goreng, which is a sort of Indonesian fried rice.

Those who have been reading my earlier posts would know that I. HATE.white.rice. With a passion. So much that just the sight of a bowl of white rice makes me want to hurl. I’m not exaggerating, I just hate white rice so much, probably due to all those years my parents tried to force-feed me that vile refined grain. Stupid, immature, I know, but can’t help how I feel.

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Anyway, this made it all the worse because not only is it white rice, it is fried in oil (and not even the “healthy” oils like olive or canola) and overcooked to boot. Plus, not a speck of vegetable to be seen anywhere. Oh wait, strike that, there was one teeny weensy bit of greasy onion. Boy, way to hit my daily recommended servings of vegetables.

Despite all this, I decided that I was not going to start off my first meal into the Penang trip in failure. So I picked up my fork and ate. Every scrap of it. Yup, even the damn rice. Here’s the proof:

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The beef satay was actually quite good. The rice was just, eh. But I didn’t die, so I’m okay. Though I was a bit turned off by the remaining coat of orange grease left from the fried rice.

I’m not really a glass-half-full person. It’s one of the things I’ve always been trying to change about myself, but am still a long way off. So when I reached Kristine’s house, all the negative points stuck out like a sore thumb:

1) There is NO hot water! How the hell am I supposed to take a shower? What’s more, the water is from the mountains, so it’s extra freezing cold! Guess I’m gonna have to go without a bath for six days?!!

2) NO wireless service! AAAAAAHHHH! The blogger in me was gasping in anguish.

3) Very, very minimal cooking appliances and equipment. Like, there’s not even a microwave. You need a lighter to set fire to the “stove.” The knives are blunt and frankly, useless. The fridge is well…perfect for an alcoholic bachelor.

4) And on the subject of fridges…The contents in the fridge? Hotdogs. White rice. White bread. Freezer-burned cake. Frozen fish left open on a plate, stinking up the whole fridge. Instant noodle packages (I have no idea why they store that in the fridge?). And…that’s about it. Not even a miserable leaf of vegetables or a fruit!

5) There is NO grocery store at a reasonable distance. As a girl who goes grocery shopping nearly everyday for fresh produce, this is a total nightmare.

6) There is like a permanent stink in the house. A disgusting mingle of rotting fish, bloody meat, and mildew. And there is no air ventilation in the bathroom. I feel like I’m underwater, having to hold my breath all the time.

7) Hello, moth. Hello, wasp. Hello, fire-ant. Hello, cockroaches and non-identifiable insects and tiny worms. Yes, I am literally sleeping with the bugs.

8) The dogs here are left out in the open, unleashed by irresponsible, inconsiderate owners. And they’re not those cute little adorable puppies that wag their tails and look up upon you with doleful, adoring eyes. No, these are vicious, ugly creatures that bark and snarl at you just because you had the guts to walk pass them. I have 3-5 of these irritating dogs yapping and growling and following me all the way to the end of the street each time I walk pass.

On the bright side, thank God, Hallelujah, I had the wisdom to bring along a big packet of rolled oats. Dinner was a rushed affair because we had church service. I had a big bowl of oatmeal while the others chowed down a couple of fried hotdogs with white bread. After service, they went out for “supper” but it was already midnight and I wasn’t ready for deep-fried street foods that late into the night, so I stayed in and had another 2 bowls of oatmeal. I may be having oatmeal quite a lot the next few days. Not that I’ll ever get sick of oatmeal, but I just feel…so damn guilty that I can’t just eat what the others eat.

So that’s how the first day went. A bit of success, a bit of failures. One day down, 5 more to go.

Damn, I miss my comfortable, pampered life in Singapore and the States.

03/03/2009: Day Two


Wow. Today actually wasn’t that bad at all. The discomforts were still there, but maybe…I’m getting used to it? I’m starting to learn to deal with the fact that I can’t always manipulate things to fit my eating schedule and regimens. The fishy stink in the house and having all sort of insects as my playmates still bother me, but not as much…

But the best part of it is that I’m starting to really warm up to the family. I’ve known Kristine for a while, but this is the first time I’ve had more than a polite greeting with her family. I like them, and they seem to like me, too. Especially the youngest kid, Jireh, who maybe like me a bit too much. He follows me around constantly, asking millions of questions: “What are you doing? Why is your gum pink? Why did you pop your gum? How do you pop it? Why are you reading?” A cute kid, but drives me mad sometimes.

Anyway, for lunch today Kristine and I went to a Japanese restaurant! She knows how much I like Japanese food in Singapore, so she took me to town, where there are a lot of different, “classier” restaurants. I treated her to lunch this time, since her family was housing me and I was using her room.

I ordered the ishiyaki hanitama (yikes, say that three times fast!). Haha, of course I had to ask what that was first, since there were no descriptions in English, but as soon as they said “eggs” and “crabmeat”, I knew instantly that that was what I wanted. It came piping hot to me in a claypot, and they poured a thick, sweet sauce all over. Here’s a quick pic:

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Basically fried egg-omelette with mushrooms and crabmeat, but cooked into a shape of a dome. The sauce was some kind of sticky, red mixture, and I’m pretty sure honey and soy sauce were the main ingredients.

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This was really very good, especially since they had all my favorite components: eggs, sweet, savory. The eggs were really well-cooked, so creamy but not runny! Though I could have done with less sweet sauce. It got a bit overbearing by the end, so if there ever is a next time I would order the sauce on the side.

Kristine ordered the pork mayonnaise and a chawanmushi:

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I stole several bites of both. The pork mayonnaise was quite tasty! It was cooked teppanyaki-style and served on a sizzling plate, with onions, ginger, and thin slices of pork in a tangy mayonnaise dressing. Yum.

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The chawanmushi (steamed egg custard) was delicious too, of course. It is really like a savory dessert, with the rich consistency of a pudding, but with all the umami taste of dashi broth and steamed egg. Inside was nested some crabmeat and fish cake.

When we came back home I took a 3-hour nap! The hot humid weather really makes you feel dull and stupid. The bad thing was, it was 7:30 pm when I got up and the church service starts at 8! I panicked about whether I would have enough time to prepare something for myself. I had planned on oatmeal, but obviously would not have enough time. I rummaged the fridge and decided to soft-boil two super-large eggs. I was just done with peeling them when people started arriving for the meeting…bringing food! Damn, if only I’d waited just a few more minutes! They brought pizza, so I had a piece of the seafood pizza with my 2 soft-boiled eggs and soy sauce:

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Yes, pizza is a fear food, but I made myself eat it because I knew dinner had to be more substantial than 2 eggs and coffee. The pizza wasn’t that good…not enough cheese and toppings in my opinion, but I was happy that I got to conquer a fear food today again.

After the meeting it was almost midnight again. I had two heaping bowl of oats (gotta have my oatmeal fix), some gingerbread men cookies, some white bread with peanut butter and kaya. I sort of lost count on how many I ate; I was just trying to shove in some calories as I felt I didn’t have enough today.

03/04/2009: Day Three


I am damn proud of myself today. I believe my head has swelled up to the size of a giant inflated balloon out of pride and triumph.

The pastor and our host family and I planned to hike up the Air Itam hill this afternoon. It’s a small hill leading up to the Air Itam dam and overlooks the whole of Penang in one captivating scenery. But before that, we had to fuel ourselves with lunch.

Right up to half-way the drive to lunch, I had no idea where we were going. I was a bit antsy, but then Jim (the host father) suddenly informed us that he was taking us to somewhere famous for char kway teow called the Two Sisters*. My anxiety level shot up! For those of you unfamiliar with Southeast Asian cuisine, char kway teow is a greasy dish of fried flat rice noodles with different seafood items. It is both carb and fat-laden, and is considered a “trash dish”: chock-full of calories with very little nutrients. Seriously, search up that dish in Google with “calories” and “nutrition” and it’s one of the number one dish doctors do not recommend for healthy eating.

As panic swarmed in, I quickly consoled myself that I did not need to order char kway teow; I could always order something less scary…but then Jim went on to add that since this place was so famous for its fabulous heart-attack inducing dish, that was the only dish they sold in the damn place!

I realized I had no way out. I was being forced to face a major fear food, whether I liked it or not. At first I felt anger and animosity towards them. What the hell? Did they not understand that I was an-o-rexic? Did they not care how difficult and scary this was for me? Then I woke up. What the double hell? I told myself. You’re being freaking selfish. You’re a visitor in Penang, so of course they would want to introduce you to a Penang specialty. And isn’t this trip all about challenging yourself and conquering your food fears? Besides, if this place is that famous, this char kway teow oughta be damn good…

And it was good. Them two sisters really know how to fry up some great char kway teow. Here’s a snapshot of my dish:

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It had two succulent prawns, some strong-tasting cockles, a bit of crabmeat, some beaten egg, and also some bean sprouts for extra crunch. The noodles were oily, but not dripping with grease. It was just perfectly fried over high heat for a bit of a crispy exterior while remaining firm and chewy inside. I actually finished the entire dish, save for one small mouthful.

Jim the liar. Turns out they do serve a few other things besides char kway teow. We ordered some appetizers:

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Yam cake. A sticky, dense cake of rice flour and taro, topped with fried onions and shallots. I had several bites of this. Wish there were more taro in there, as I barely tasted the yam.

We also ordered otah:

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This was freaking delicious! It is ground fish with coconut milk and lots of different kind of spices cooked in banana leaf. You might recall me eating this in Singapore, but this one was much larger, more fragrant, and the spice was much more complex. I sort of monopolized this one, and ate half of it! Heh, heh.

After that we climbed the Air Itam hill. The view over Penang was magnificent, but the weather was too freaking hot to enjoy it as much. I was all sweaty and sticky and felt uber-gross. So when we got home…I finally gave in and hopped into an icy cold shower. Yup, me, Sophia Lee the skinny girl terrified of the cold, actually enjoyed a freezing cold shower. I gave a scream at the first blast, but then…as the people here say, it was damn shiok! (Singlish for “cool” or “good” or “refreshing”)

So here’s a victory toast to a damn shiok day!

* The Two Sisters is named that because the char kway teow is fried by twin sisters. One of them fries them up in the morning, the other in the afternoon. Apparently their business is so good, they own three houses from their prosperous char kway teow business! So if you’re ever in the area, be sure to stop by to visit these sisters’ place!

03/05/2009: Day Four


Okay. Today was not a good day eating-wise. I kind of slipped, and I’m not proud of myself.

Lunch was just Kristine and I together in town because we needed to pick some stuff up at the plaza. We decided to try out this restaurant/cafe called Dome after perusing the menu they displayed outside. I was at first excited about this restaurant because of their all-day breakfast. Unfortunately, my enthusiasm ebbed away quickly enough.

First off, Dome neglected to include their prices on the displayed menu, and with good reason, too. R8.50 for a small cup of coffee? I could almost feel a hole burning in my wallet as I stared flabbergasted at these outrageous prices. But we’d already been seated and greeted by our waitress, so we couldn’t well just get up and bloody leave. But oh, how I wish we had.

The service was pretty horrible. The waitress’ answer to my question about what beef ranchers were was, “Two strips of beef.” And when I asked her if they had whole-grain options to their toasts, she shrugged and said, “I don’t think so.” Um, ok.

Anyway, I ended up ordering poached eggs and beef ranchers on toast. All for a hefty R15.50. Look at this miserable picture and tell me if it was worth it:

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Straight away, I knew I was set out for a bad lunch. The eggs were tiny, the beef was marbled with fat and tendons, and the toast just looked dry and unappetizing. But the worst part? The eggs were completely overcooked! Now God knows I love egg yolks, but only if they are nice and runny. These were cooked all the way into dry crumbly orange cakes! I thought poached eggs are supposed to have runny yolks? What’s more, these eggs were totally unseasoned and tasteless.

I was majorly pissed off. One of my biggest pet peeve is having to pay big bucks for a crappy meal in a pretentious restaurant. I ended up eating just one and a half of the eggs and none of the toasts. I did finish the beef ranchers, though. They were the only thing that had some flavor, albeit a bit too salty.

Kristine ordered the chicken pot pie:

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It came with a fat puff pastry on top of a pretty soupy creamy stew. I tried a bite. It was definitely better than mine, but just mediocre and definitely not worth the R18.00 she paid for it.

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Now here is when the ED waters get a bit murky. I wonder if I should have forced myself to eat all of that even if I didn’t like it. Was it ED of me to get so upset over a bad meal and eating so poorly? I know if it had been my brother, he would have still finished the dish even if it wasn’t good just because he was hungry. If my parents were there with me, they would have lectured me and called this eating disordered, saying that I shouldn’t care about the taste so much as my main objective is to recover from ED and gain weight anyway. What do you think? What would you have done in my situation?

Anyway, the rest of my eats that day in brief form: yogurt, apples, and a banana at home to make up for the bad lunch. Vegetables, 3 extra-large soft-boiled eggs, and Thai fish soup before church service, then 2 bowls of oats, 3 soft-boiled eggs, tiny bite of donut after. God, I hate cramming in calories late at night.

03/06/2009: Day Five (Last day!)


Lunch today was at a Japanese restaurant again! After that disastrous lunch yesterday, we wanted to make sure we would have a great lunch today, so Japanese it was! I’ve decided that you just can’t have a bad meal in a Japanese restaurant, because I haven’t had one yet. We wanted to dine at Swensen’s at first, but the prices were outrageous so we decided on a more reasonably priced Junid Express.

I ordered the tori cheese:

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I think tori means “chicken” in Japanese, because this was some grilled marinated chicken baked with a fat layer of mozzarella cheese on top.

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The chicken was really juicy and tender, since it also soaked up the fat from the cheese.

Kristine ordered the chicken teppanyaki:

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This was a set meal, with marinated chicken and vegetables done teppanyaki-style, along with white rice, miso soup, ocha, and some watermelon. I “stole” two pieces of chicken from her dish ^___^

Oh and you know what? I am totally liking the cold shower. So much, in fact, that I’m taking up to 3 showers a day. This blast of freezing water really refreshes me and rejuvenates my spirit, especially since this crazy humid and sweltering Malaysian weather is making me feel so slow and languid and sticky all the time.

And…I don’t mind the stink anymore. Nor having bugs as playmates. I’m learning to deal with the irregular eating schedules. And I’m really enjoying the company. My host family are terrific people and you know what? I think I’m really gonna miss them.

03/07/2009: Leaving day


Wow. Who knew I’d actually be kind of sad to leave Penang? Don’t get me wrong, I’m not planning for permanent stay at all, but still…as I said goodbye to the family in the morning, there was a bit of ache inside of me as I realized it would probably be years before I saw them again. Kind of funny because I recall that I was absolutely itching to hop on the plane back on the first day.

We took the 1:15 pm plane flight back to Singapore, so lunch was served on the plane. This time I actually had a choice of what I wanted: pizza or chicken with fried noodles. Both are major fear foods, but I chose chicken with fried noodles because for some crazy reason I thought noodles would probably be more nutritious than pizza. How was I to know that when they said “noodles,” they meant instant ramen noodles? And that by “chicken,” they meant some kind of processed deli chicken meatballs? Just take a look at this sleazy meal!

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This was a double whammy on fear foods! I instantly wished I had chosen pizza instead. But then I remembered that this was the last day. I would be going back home, where I could cook nutritious, healthy foods for myself again. One meal of crappy MSG-laden, fried foods will not kill me.

So I picked up my crappy plastic fork and choked down my crappy meal. And guess what? I enjoyed every scrap of that crappy noodles and crappy chicken. The food snob in me was actually ashamed to have relished this ultimate junk food so much, but there was just something about the sheer crappiness of this meal that made the entire experience quite…sinfully tasty and pleasurable. Don’t laugh. But years of extremely health-conscious eating will do that to you.

Anyway, when I got home I immediately made something I’ve been craving in Penang:

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My oh-so-simple but oh-so-delicious toasts of jam, cheese, and smoked ham.


And for dinner, I’m planning to have my all-time favorite comfort meal, Eggplasta Pudding. Damn, I’m pooped, and I have missed almost a whole week of internet, so I’m gonna indulge in some major blog-reading now. I’ll see ya tomorrow, when I’ll share a bit more on what I learnt from my Penang trip.

Oh, and today’s question of the day: What was the crappiest meal you’ve had in a restaurant? Did you still eat it and pay for it, or did you complain to the server?

P.S. Thank you to every one of you who left all these great, sweet, encouraging comments on my last post!!!

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